Marcus Briggs

Every parent wants to know that their kid knows what to do should they ever encounter a kidnapper. Several years ago, when our kids were younger, my wife, Chelsea, explained to them what to do if a stranger invited them somewhere. At this point in life, our oldest already had an excellent grasp on this, so the talk was mainly for our youngest, Shaw. However, like most knowledgeable older siblings, Camilla wanted to show off her situational prowess to her younger sister and brother. 

She interrupted Chelsea and said, “I know what to do. First, you ask them for our family code word, and if they don’t know it, you scream, run away, and find a grownup.” 

After a few accolades from Chelsea, Camilla continued with full animation, “I even know what to do if they were to try and pick me up and carry me away. I’d scream, kick them, punch them, and bite them.” Chelsea, seizing the moment, said, “That’s exactly right. Shaw, did you hear all of that? Do you know what to do?” 

Shaw, wide-eyed, but only partially engaged, replied, “Uh-huh, I’d run away and bite a grownup.”  Shaw knew all the elements necessary to resist a kidnapping, but the error was in the application. 

As leaders, we all have heard and even committed to memory many of the qualities, techniques, and practices of leadership. Our error isn’t a lack of information; it’s in the application. Information requires a willing mind, but application requires skillful plans and skillful hands. But what if the necessary skills remain just out of reach for the leader? 

Most leadership training focuses on the knowledge and skills of the leader, aiming to enhance what the leader brings to the table. However, leadership has always been—and will continue to be— more about people than skills. 

Leadership is more about WHO you bring to the table than what you bring to it. 

I grew up believing that a leader was a person who stood alone, above the crowd, and led with their arsenal of skills, talents, and creativity. If this were true, the statement, “It’s lonely at the top,” makes total sense. However, it seems to be lonely at the top only because many leaders don’t like to lean. We don’t like leaning on others who possess the abilities required for the vision God has given. If your skills, talents, and abilities, without any help, are enough to fulfill the vision, then leadership isn’t necessary. Leaders are leaners (yes, auto-correct, we’re talking about leaning). Who are you bringing to the table? Who are you leaning on? Adam had Eve, Moses had Aaron, David had Nathan, and many others we could name who were leaners. 

We need to enlarge the circle we lean on. Leading that relies on others produces a greater impact than lonely leadership from the top. Here are three directions all Christian leaders need to learn to lean. 

Lean into Jesus. 

Ok, yeah, this one might seem obvious… and it doesn’t take a PhD in leadership to know this. However, ask yourself, how often do I lead without leaning on Jesus? If we’re honest, it’s probably more often than we’d like to admit. We all know the passage in Proverbs, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6 [NIV]). The context here is regarding a time when we have understanding. It’s in the moments that we think we understand that we forget to lean on the Lord. Experience should train us to aim our lean toward Him, but it often trains us to lean the way we did last time. Perhaps this is why the Lord continuously allows us to encounter obstacles beyond our understanding. We need to resonate with the closing words of Jehoshaphat’s prayer in 2 Chronicles. When faced with an invading army, he prayed, “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you” (2 Chronicles 20:12 [NIV]). 

Lean on a Nathan. 

Every leader needs a prophetic voice that knows how to deliver the Word of the Lord to them wisely. I recently heard Leonard Sweet speak on this idea, communicating that accountability doesn’t accomplish the same thing as a prophetic voice. Yes, leaders need accountability. However, accountability is only as good as your transparency, and too many leaders are trying to be accountable in isolation. After committing adultery with Bathsheba, 2 Samuel, Chapter 11, ends with the phrase, “But the thing David had done displeased the Lord.” The next chapter begins with, “The Lord sent Nathan to David.” Nathan not only delivered the Word of the Lord, but he did it in a way that was heard by David and led to repentance. 

Lean on your spouse. 

If you are leading in ministry and are married, you have been blessed with an individual designed as a suitable helper in the calling of God. It’s easy to overlook the helper beside us, while praying for help elsewhere. If we genuinely believe that “the two become one,” then why wouldn’t we expect, at least in some part, for the calling to be united as well? Before Eve was created, the Scriptures record, “But for Adam no suitable helper was found.” Sadly, even in marriage, many leaders overlook the most suitable helper (their spouse) because of calling isolation. Don’t forget to lean. 

Leaning for a leader may not be natural, but it is necessary. There are people around you who possess the skills, talents, and capabilities needed to fulfill the calling of God in you. The best leaders choose not to be intimidated by those giftings and, instead, learn to lean on those who are gifted. God’s calling is bigger than us and our abilities. So, let’s become leaders who know how to lean.