Chelsea Briggs
I rarely step foot in grocery stores nowadays thanks to pickup services, but around Easter this year, I dashed into Target with my kids for some teacher appreciation supplies. As we approached the self-checkout register, the kids spotted the machine that, without fail, always manages to flip on their begging switches, the Icee machine. They were drawn to a brand new, limited edition flavor, Peeps. Yes, you read that right… a Peeps-flavored Icee. But wait! Icees aren’t supposed to taste like marshmallows, and Peeps aren’t supposed to slush. These had to taste too Peeps for Icee or too Icee for Peeps. I just knew this flavor was going to disappoint, but I happily obliged their request and treated them to this unusual mix-up. I made them pay me their mom tax by letting me try it, and much to my surprise, it was a 10/10 and absolutely delicious.
Although, in a perfect world, we’d like to say we don’t struggle with holding these same beliefs about family and ministry, I’m afraid in reality, too many of us are crushing under the weight of expectations from both camps. We sometimes fall into the trap of thinking that valuing one weakens the other. We work hard to navigate the balancing act. But if balance is the goal, then we’ve forgotten that cliché, timeless truth… God first, family second, ministry third. The very fact that there’s an order of priority to our values is evidence that these should not be equally balanced.
The goodness we tasted that day at Target was not an Icee-flavored Peep, but a Peeps-flavored Icee. No competition existed between brands, only complementing, because identity was clearly defined. We knew we had just enjoyed Icees that tasted like Peeps.
In a similar way, we are called to be families who do ministry, not ministers with families. Not family and ministry, but family ministry. At home, at church, and in our community, when we lead from who we are and not from what we do, it is seen, it is tasted, and it is good. Our family flavor should be one that people crave, leaving our presence knowing they enjoyed being around a family that has something they need. If we view our calling to family and our calling to ministry as mutually exclusive, we miss out on one of the greatest, most effective tools for evangelism. God only issues us complementing callings, never competing ones.
The only way to have both a healthy family and a healthy ministry is to practice practical evangelism, or ministry on-the-go. This is how the two become mutually beneficial. So what are the practicals?
The simplest way to do ministry is by incorporating evangelism into what you already do as a family. More often than not, it’s intentionally doing life with your kids’ peers and their parents, but this way of living is not limited to young families. My in-laws come back from almost every vacation with life-long connections to people they ministered to, and they aim to have attitudes in their social circles that boast the love of Jesus. As a family, we do this in a variety of ways, whether it’s coaching our kids’ sports teams while teaching players our values, hosting their practices on our church campus and meeting parents where they are, serving in carpool with Dad’s Club on Fridays, or volunteering at school and connecting with teachers. “Make the most of every opportunity…” (Ephesians 5:16).
All these things can seem either typical or transformative depending on how you approach them. We like to walk into these scenarios viewing them as opportunities and thinking of ourselves as undercover agents of the Gospel. As strange as that may sound, it’s really just entering these settings with a different set of eyes. We’ve certainly missed it on more than one occasion, but God moments are happening around us all the time. I could tell you stories about atheists from our sports teams attending our church or crying and praying with a mom in a parking lot after chaperoning a field trip because God made a way for us to turn surface-level conversations into Jesus ones. “So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us” (2 Corinthians 5:20).
This type of ministry doesn’t subtract from time with our family, but instead adds a special value to it. Our kids still get to look up and see our face, hear our voice, know that we are present, and learn from our example.
Ministry has the greatest impact on our family when we move from including them to involving them. Sure, we love it even when they’re just along for the ride. But in order to build their character, call out their gifts, and foster their love for serving, we have to do more than include them as a part and start involving them as a participant. They need to consistently be given the confidence key to unlock the belief that they are integral and they have a purpose. “… For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children” (Mark 10:14).
It doesn’t have to be complicated. Start with the obvious and make it fun. This looks like small kids helping the events team pop all the balloons from the photo op, preteens volunteering in the toddler class, teens looking for a guest to befriend, young adults inviting someone to lunch, asking one of your children to pray for the food when you host a dinner, or jumping in as a family to help with physical labor at an event. Go on a mission trip together (I took our oldest daughter to Ecuador last summer and made lifetime memories)! Talk about the WHY. Engagement moves from organic to expected to desirable. There’s nothing quite like watching your kids ready to dive head first into joining your team. “Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road…” (Deuteronomy 6:7).
We have found there’s no better way to disciple families than by inviting them to see how family is done. From lead team to key volunteers to your kids’ friend groups, be creatively invitational. Of course we have nights, days, vacations, and sabbaticals reserved as safe spaces for just our unit. But goodness, I can’t tell you the spiritual difference you can make for another person’s family by simply making room for them at your table, in your backyard, or at the arcade, ice cream shop, or trampoline park. This is effortless ministry that flows out of being, not doing. Preparations are minimal and even better when imperfect. “… Go out to the roads and country lanes and compel them to come in, so that my house will be full” (Luke 14:23).
Let’s have people lined up at the door for new, limited edition families, offering a blend so surprisingly delightful they keep coming back for more. Let’s make every effort to hear our kids say, “I can’t believe we GET to do this.” This is how we grow.
Chelsea Briggs and her husband, Marcus, have been married for 16 years, and together they serve as Lead Pastors of Riverpark Church in Shreveport, Louisiana. They have three children — Camilla (11), Lettie (9), and Shaw (7), and their dream as a family is to live authentically and show their community who Jesus really is.
